Content advisory: Please be aware that this post will discuss material of a highly sensitive nature, including suicide.

In 2014, I sank into a deep depression that left me feeling utterly hopeless and suicidal. It felt like being trapped in an endless fog, where each day blurred into the next.

In my desperation, I tried everything—meditation, Reiki, acupuncture, sessions with a shaman, and countless sessions with psychologists. Nothing seemed to help.

Eventually, I sought the help of a psychiatrist recommended by my teacher from Stanford's Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction program. It took nearly a year from my first panic attack, but I finally began to feel like myself again.

Five years later, I realized something unexpected: I had become happier than I had ever been before the depression. This transformation was rooted in my determination to never return to that dark place.

I began to focus only on the truly important things in life, aligning with the principles of Covey’s Big Rock Theory: prioritizing the things that truly matter and letting go of the small, insignificant stresses.

I also learned to give those I love the space to make their own mistakes, which often leads to moments of delight when they prove me wrong. I love myself more now and get upset less.

I also gained a deeper understanding of myself, especially regarding the role that work plays in my life. I had blamed work stress for my depression and took six months off, believing it would help.

To my surprise, my depression deepened without the structure and distraction of a workplace. I came to realize, somewhat reluctantly, that work is a vital source of fulfillment for me. Without it, I became restless in ways I hadn’t anticipated.

Work provides me with a sense of camaraderie, shared achievement, and purpose—elements that helped me navigate this challenging period. While I could have volunteered or initiated a new project, I found it impossible to take the lead when I lacked the optimism to start something brand new.

Now, I prioritize ruthlessly, focusing on what truly fulfills me: my work, mentoring those who seek guidance, and being present for my children. These are the things that keep me grounded and content.