This is an anonymous post from an Elpha member.

Woke up the next morning and quit all my jobs

Anjelica217·Apr 08, 2022

Posted in:Advice

After pulling 45 hours by Tuesday from my 3 jobs. I took a moment to just feel and it felt empty. The next two mornings I woke up with the immediatel thought something is missing. I then went ahead and quit my jobs and am left with the unknown of what's next. I love what I do but the companies were not for me and even if it was just 1 I'm still missing on life big time.

So here I am. 10k in the bank no job. passive income that'll cover my means and assessing if I should go on health leave because I have a medical history and might need surgery. And already asked an employer to be part of the paperwork process as it wont cost them anything. The passive income and health leave together is about 10k and I'm frugal and this will be okay.

Here's what in considering:

Travelling or living in Stockholm, finishing masters and going on health leave
Funding my startup $250k-$4M that's already written up. If this is it I have no interest in being the CEO and runnfing the company. I'd be more interested in paying myself some kind of comp from the sweat equity
Finding a new job - but worry I'd do same patterns and be in the same place and not be happy

Here is what I know

School resistance and easiest to do
Long term health leave I actually dont know if I'll be approvef
Funding company dont want the responsibility
I know how to get recruited and target company profiles to land roles

I really want the first option and live in another country and have a simple yet enriched life for a while. I found my career and I'm good at it but really want to change things but dont want rosy lens that a new environment would change my behavior and that I would need to do the same thing. And somehow I need to find that link of what's missing.

jasminemastrolia·Apr 09, 2022

So moving to a new country doesn't instantly solve all of your problems.But it can make things a lot better.I moved four years ago because I just couldn't do it anymore, and I do not regret it. It gave me the step back I needed to reassess. It forced me to acknowledge the full extent of my capabilities. It gave me new opportunities.Now, in just four years, I've made several of my life bucket list things come true, and I'm living, mostly, the life I imagined (big picture - the details are quite different, but better!). It sounds like moving is the thing you want the most, so do it. I don't know what you do, but try freelancing for a while if you can, or can you start your startup as a sole person? Figure out a way to fund life in a new country, even if it means tightening the budget some. Then, in 6 months, you can reassess for longterm plans.And I don't know why Stockholm, and it's none of my business, but stay open. I had chosen Italy, and it turns out, I needed to be open to other countries to find my real place. It wasn't where I expected.Good luck and I wish you all the best.

lenapopretinskaya·Apr 09, 2022

Hi Anjelica. Feels like you are on big crossroads. It can be exciting and scary at the same time. Scary because of the unknown, exciting because you get to choose now. Really choose, not just respond.I don't think there is a right answer to your question. It's in you.What I recommend is to start at asking: what if you would not have to worry? What would be the answer? That will show what you really deeply want. I don't say discard your situation, but start by answering. And then, for a moment pause the considerations and ask: how would I made it happen? You can factor in the situation later in the process.Would be happy to help you to think it through if you would like some help.

amandaroeder·Apr 09, 2022

Hey Angelica! I’m curious why you were working 3 jobs in the first place? Maybe finding great place to work that supports your values could be a great next step after you take some time to recover from burnout.

Deloise15·Apr 09, 2022

Hi Anjelica - I recently read a book called Designing Your Life [https://designingyour.life/the-book/] that shares exercises and questions that might be helpful to orient yourself and decide on your next steps. One of the exercises that stood out to me was a regular checking in on how full the "tanks" are for a variety of life areas, like work, relationships, health, and play, and exploring ways to add more gas to each of these tanks. It could be that the "something" that is missing in your life is not related to your job, but something else on a deeper level. ❤️❤️❤️

susanoneilllefevre·Apr 09, 2022

Thank you so much @deloise15 for mentioning this book. Going to check it out!

iammyr·Apr 11, 2022

that's the same as "The Wheel of Life" exercise! you can google it cause there's a ton of resources about it online. but here's a random source https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newHTE_93.htm

susanoneilllefevre·Apr 09, 2022

You’ve gotten some great advice here. As someone who moved overseas to “hit the reset button,” I’d absolutely recommend it. The fact that you’d also be completing your Master’s is even better: you’ll have something to focus on as well as an avenue for meeting people and forming new relationships. You can be mindful of not recreating old patterns. Now that counseling and coaching have gone virtual, maybe you could find someone to help on that side as well. Truly I think going overseas or to a completely new city is the best way to connect with who you are and what you really want. Best of luck to you!