Do you really really want to be more confident, my friend?
This question may sound like a no-brainer, but I am absolutely serious about this.
There’s hardly anyone who does not have “feeling confident” high up on their goal list. I’m sure you do too.
And still, how consistent are you in pursuing greater confidence?
I get it. Working on confidence is different from checking boxes on your to-do list at work or optimizing for the metrics that you’ve set out for a tangible goal, like saving money for the down-payment on a house or taking x classes a month to be ready for your certification by fall.
Granted, it’s different – but not as much as you think right now.
There are two reasons why you feel you’re not getting there:
either you don’t know how to do it – if you are 100% sure that’s it, jump straight to the last paragraph – or you don’t really want it. Yet, that is.
Because, the thing is, we want a ton of things – and don’t get them because we are unwilling to pay the hidden costs.
Let's say, that friend of yours who says they’d love to be famous? Do they really do anything they can, and I mean anything, to reach fame?
If the answer is no, it might be because they have reasons that attract them to fame (like having fans or a million readers), and others that push them away (like not being able to run around in sweats without ending up in the “What the hell happened to…” column of a people magazine).
It’s possible you are experiencing the same duality with confidence.
While you know that greater confidence would help you nail your dream job and that salary increase you deserve, a part of you may shy away from being in charge of a team, or proving that you’re “worth” that large sum of money you’re being paid.
Or maybe you expect your family to lean more on you when you show up with greater confidence, and that scares
This is why today I am inviting you to get real and answer the following three questions:
1) What benefits do I expect from feeling more confident?
2) What are my hidden costs of greater confidence?
3) Am I willing to pay these costs?
Please be brutally honest with yourself.
It’s okay to feel torn about something we consider a good thing.
Only if you know what your hidden costs of greater confidence are, you’ll be able to answer the question if you are willing to pay these costs … right now.
If your answer is, not really – no need to despair!
And please don’t beat yourself up for it.
This is where you are, and I invite you to honor that place first.
And then move forward.
Because there’s the next set of questions you can add:
4) Why am I afraid of these hidden costs?
5) Is it a fact that I would have to pay this price?
6) What does it cost me to not build greater confidence?
Again, brutally honest please.
Because the price we pay to get something and the price we pay to stay where we are both need to be looked at to make sure you are putting yourself up for your best life.
Did anything shift in your perspective with the first and/or second set of questions?
Did you gain any insight? (I’d love to hear it!!)
If you have made it to this paragraph, you have either put in the work to analyze what is holding you back and are ready to take the next step – or you know for sure that the only thing in your way is lack of suitable tools to train your confidence.
Either way, I’m here to support you!
Want to join the betagroup from June 1 to June 29, 2022?
In a series of five meetings, I'll teach you my confidence framework – so that you can tap into your confidence whenever you need to step up your game.
Interested? Just message me or click the link!