I receive a lot of "Loved it. Great job man!" feedback. Should I ignore/correct/other? 😂😂😂

Nastya

Nastya·Aug 11, 2020·4 replies

My startup is about CrossFit, Functional Fitness, and HIIT. The majority of my users are male. My fit users love what I do, and I truly love all my users and enjoy working on the project.Also, I'm a tech founder, which means I wrote all the code.Reading feedback "Loved it. Great job man!" is flattering of course, but also gives me a bag of mixed feeling.Sometimes I correct a person, sometimes ignore, but it always throws me off. When I correct a person I feel like I waste my time on something not important for the project. When I ignore I feel like a traitor for gender equality purpose and "woman who code" movement...And what do you think is correct way to react?

saskiahill·Aug 11, 2020·1 reply

Tough situation!Discussed with my (male) partner - he feels 'man' and 'dude' can be used in a gender neutral way/in a way that isn't specifying gender, so maybe it's not them assuming you're male. I'm not so convinced...One suggestion he came up with which makes the point, but doesn't 'blame' or 'nitpick' the person for getting it wrong could be 'Thanks! #womenwhocode 💪' or 'Thanks 💁🏼‍♀️'Props to you for creating a product that is so popular that people want to thank you!!! 😊

Nastya

Nastya·Aug 11, 2020·1 reply

Nastya

Nastya·Aug 11, 2020·1 reply

"but doesn't 'blame' or 'nitpick'" - that is a very good point. Because my users are not jerks, they just make simple assumptions, based on their life experiences. I corrected a few times, something simple like "Thanks, and I'm a girl", the guys started apologizing and I felt like I was sending them on the guilt trip...

saskiahill·Aug 11, 2020

It's tricky - it's important to feel recognised as your true self, but it can be hard without feeling like you're telling people off! Every response is valid, this just felt like a balance that lets you tell them without causing friction 👍

IreneB·Aug 12, 2020

I've worked in male dominated industries for most of my 20+ year career. I think "man" and "dude" are basically gender neutral at this point. I think I might reply with something along the lines of, "Thank you so much! #womenwhocode" or "Glad to be the (Wo)Man who can get it done for ya'll!" Good luck!